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Frequently, when talking with others with MS and in our own minds the issue of "what if" comes up. What if the time comes when I can't walk, can't use my hands, can't speak and the list goes on. The concerns are many. A lot of people have already faced those what ifs and life goes on.
What I want people to think about is that the "what ifs" may never happen, and you can spend too much time dwelling on these things and casting a dark shadow over your life now. Worrying and stressing over things that may never happen is a waste of great energy and is bound to affect your life day to day. If those worries become reality, deal with them then. And you will! And life can go on, in a forward direction. Don't be immobilized now by fear and worry.
You must make decisions based on your hopes and dreams keeping your capabilities in mind. But don't plan your future around a disease. Of course you take MS into consideration, but it can't be your deciding factor for things. An example of this is, that I am mobile, and if I was going to buy a new house, I wouldn't buy one with mega stairs, but neither would I look for one with a ramp and total accessibility already there.
Focus on what you can do and enjoy the moment instead of what you can't do. There is little we can do about "what ifs" anyway. What will happen will happen. Don't live waiting and worrying about something that may never come to pass. I know this is easier said than done. I especially understand those of you with small children. I consider myself very lucky that MS didn't find me until I was 39. Although my kids weren't all grown up, neither were they young. But don't dwell on inadequacies you think you have as a parent.
It's important for everyone to realize that the essence of any relationship has nothing to do with how well our arms and legs do or don't work, but it's what is at the heart and soul, that are the ties that bind.
I personally think that the MS experience has given my children an enhanced awareness of compassion for others, and of their own strength, hopefully better preparing them for whatever lies ahead.
It would be nice to see everyone live life to the fullest, move toward his or her dreams and not live under the dark cloud of "what if".
Count your blessings instead of your woes and live for what IS!
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